It’s pretty common in nowadays saying that failure is a “necessary evil” to a more successful life. But what about how to make it easier to handle it? In such a way that you don’t end up giving up instead of persevering?
Convincing the mind that “it’s okay to fail” can seem like a magic trick. Even when you’re a wizard at managing failure, it’s still an uncomfortable experience.
The good news is that you are not alone. There are countless beautiful minds who consistently maintain that failure is a mandatory part of success.
We see people’s dream life where everything is amazing. Pretty often, behind the scenes there has been failure, disappointment and frustration at some point in time. The difference? Re-bounce.
Looking from distance and listening (reading) somebody else’s stories, sounds great. How A, B or C went from failure in their business or personal life to an empire or steady relation. That’s all very inspiring indeed. But going through it ourselves is a different story, isn’t it?
You don’t tell yourself “I failed, so what”? And you get mad at people when they say “everything will be all right”.
Go back to all stories and examples you heard or read about. They all talk about past examples. They all talk about situations they went through – in the past – and today they’re on a much better or at least more peaceful situation with the world or with themselves. So it’s much easier to look back and say “I learned a lot, it was tough but it made me grow” or “I’m thankfully I went through all that”. And yes, you go through that process of telling yourself (and the world) how important it is to fail and take the necessary learnings from that. And how you will face adversity in the future. But, you never know when adversity knocks. You never know when you’re life makes a 180° or 360° turn. How do you know in advance? how do you differentiate an adverse situation that might actually teach you a lot from one that you just screwed it up? How do you tell your mind at the exact moment “it’s ok” I will fail and learn?
Anticipate: Things can always go wrong.
Understand that you will ultimately persevere.
Look to those who have succeeded and most likely have failed more greatly then you ever will.
Diagnose the causes than work on the problems one step at a time
De-associate the failure and the bad feelings/consequences from the equation.
Tell yourself and out loud: one event won’t define you.
Just a last story worth to share. At age of 13, French tennis player Richard Gasquet was seen as the future champion. He was a wonder. During an youth international tournament, as expected he won the title and was celebrating. Sited in the other bench was his opponent, looking thoughtful. That opponent was Rafael Nadal. You know the rest of the story and where did Nadal ended up.
Life is not all about success, it’s about gaining experiences, may it be failure.
Every failure at something is a success at something else.